Are You Sure You're Okay?

March 2006

I recently picked up a ladies magazine boasting that I could be thinner, have stronger abs, more glowing hair, and a lovelier home if I would just open its cover.  Here I would discover the revealed secrets of the beautiful people.  Curious, I glanced through the pages.  Boy was I surprised!  Not that anything was bad, it was all good advice, but the subtle message to women was loud and clear - YOU'RE NOT OKAY!  I put it down discouraged and disappointed.  I'm already doing the best I can, and they tell me it's not enough.

This message is being delivered to a younger and younger audience via magazines, television, movies, music videos and the internet.  It is "self help" gone haywire.  When will it ever be enough - smart enough, pretty enough, clever enough, witty enough; lovely enough hair, figure, home, wardrobe, skin, and so on?  Is it any wonder that young girls' self esteem takes a nose dive in grades 7 and 8 from which some never fully recover?

What is the standard against which we measure ourselves?  If we allow the media to dictate, we will find ourselves on a never ending merry-go-round seeking to make ourselves more acceptable, desireable, attractive, popular, loved, admired, etc.  This quest can never end, because the bar is always being raised.  There will always be a new beauty treatment that promises us if we only do this or that we'll be happy with ourselves.  I believe it is immeasurably "saner" to keep my eyes on the Lord, who created me and desires me just as I am.  I would rather seek His Kingdom and righteousness which can never pass away.

"Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised."  Proverbs 31:29-31

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Wife, mother of three and Registered Psychologist, Dr. Skidmore is well acquainted with the challenges of living a balanced life.  A humorous and dynamic communicator, Dr. Skidmore runs her own private practice, is Executive Director of "Take it to Heart Workshops", a popular radio guest "expert", and has hosted her own radio talk show.