Secrets of Marital Success

November 2006

I recently heard a broadcast of the Dr. Laura Schlessinger show and was impressed by the response she gave a young man who called in for pre-divorce advice.  She stated she was tired of hearing people complain about spouses not meeting their needs.  She asked if he had been meeting his wife's needs, to which he sheepishly replied, "no, not really".  Then she advised the young man to hang up, and go and meet his wife's needs.

The truth is that as we give to our spouses, (and if you are a Christian believer, out of our love for the Lord), we will receive back.  The Bible says we'll receive full measure, pressed down, and running over (Luke 6:38).  It is the law of sowing and reaping.  When we sow indifference, criticism, sarcasm and lack of respect in our relationships, that is what we get in return.

If you make your husband your king with reverence and honor, you will find he begins to rise to the occasion.  Making him your king make him purr like a contented cat, and your expression of love to your husband is a tangible way of demonstrating your love to the Lord.

The truth is your husband craves your support (respect, admiration, encouragement, approval).  He longs to feel needed and wanted by you.  As you begin to meet his needs in this way, he will naturally give back to you the love you are craving.

The spiritual law of sowing and reaping says that "he who sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and he who sows bountifully will also reap bountifully" (2 Cor. 9:6).  No wonder the young man's marriage was so unfulfilling.  There's even hope for those whose marriage's are deeply troubled:  "Those who sow in tears shall reap with joyful shouting" (Psa. 126:5).  I encourage you to give it a try.  What have you got to lose?

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Wife, mother of three and Registered Psychologist, Dr. Skidmore is well acquainted with the challenges of living a balanced life.  A humorous and dynamic communicator, Dr. Skidmore runs her own private practice, is Executive Director of "Take it to Heart Workshops", a popular radio guest "expert", and has hosted her own radio talk show.